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OOM: Dreams and memories
Jun. 24th, 2008 09:52 pmOne cannot force visions; and should not use substances to facilitate them, for then one will not see what one wishes to see, and whatever one does see, makes no sense.
Since he had come to this place, Teja had rarely seen visions that were memories of Totila; one could not conjure up a dream of a beloved face at will. Teja had seen dreams of his own past, fire and blood and Tuscan hills at sunset, pine trees and cypresses stark black against the flaming sky. Sometimes, if he was lucky, pale fallen columns, generous ivy, the mating calls of cats far away, and beside him, the gentle, eager presence of Adalgoth, hands on the strings of his harp. But often, battle fields and corpses; men, women, children even, starved to or burned to death; blood dripping from the blade; or the stinking hold of a Byzantine warship.
No, if he wishes to remember all that Totila had been, Teja needs to use memory and imagination; but those are vivid; and since he has been reminded about the date, and darkness has fallen around him again, Teja has done it for hours and hours on end -- trying to catch, before his mind's eye, but a glimpse of that face, or the shimmer of sunlight on flowing golden curls.
It's been a year since Totila died, and Teja feels like a traitor for not having felt this pain every single moment of it, or at least every single moment of this strange afterlife. Teja has been dead, and the smith of Milliways, almost three times as long as he ever was king of the Goths.-
( Dreams and memories )
Since he had come to this place, Teja had rarely seen visions that were memories of Totila; one could not conjure up a dream of a beloved face at will. Teja had seen dreams of his own past, fire and blood and Tuscan hills at sunset, pine trees and cypresses stark black against the flaming sky. Sometimes, if he was lucky, pale fallen columns, generous ivy, the mating calls of cats far away, and beside him, the gentle, eager presence of Adalgoth, hands on the strings of his harp. But often, battle fields and corpses; men, women, children even, starved to or burned to death; blood dripping from the blade; or the stinking hold of a Byzantine warship.
No, if he wishes to remember all that Totila had been, Teja needs to use memory and imagination; but those are vivid; and since he has been reminded about the date, and darkness has fallen around him again, Teja has done it for hours and hours on end -- trying to catch, before his mind's eye, but a glimpse of that face, or the shimmer of sunlight on flowing golden curls.
It's been a year since Totila died, and Teja feels like a traitor for not having felt this pain every single moment of it, or at least every single moment of this strange afterlife. Teja has been dead, and the smith of Milliways, almost three times as long as he ever was king of the Goths.-
( Dreams and memories )